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Service to Bush Now Trumps Service to Country

Matt Peterson / | July 30, 2007


Mao, Stalin, Hitler, Kim Jong Il and now Supreme Allied Commander of the World, George W. Bush, all proud propagators of personality cults.  Can it be true in 21st century America that our society has slipped into the depths of the type of almost comical dictatorship that we once reviled?  Before we see the latest news lets just run down the dictator checklist to see how “The Decider” measures up:

1. Myth of the rustic manly background?  Check! All dictators must fabricate a background that screams manliness and hardship that serves as a cover for cowardice and privilege.  For Bush it is the myth of the cowboy.  When not wearing boots, jeans and a cowboy hat he is seen tottering around bowlegged with a case of ILS (Inflated Lat Syndrome: characterized by puffing the chest out and bowing the arms out to appear muscular but instead looking ridiculous).  Although his Waco “ranch” boasts no horses, due to his fear of large animals, it is still supports the cowboy myth and helps to deflect questions about dodging the draft and being an elitist from Maine.

2. Military Uniform?  Got it!  Who can forget the “Mission Accomplished Moment” aboard the Aircraft carrier!  I remember it like it was yesterday, the brave chicken hawk strutting around the deck of a massive warship as if he himself had single handedly whooped the Taliban!  However, to give him some credit it was the closest he ever got to a war… a few miles off the US east coast is closer than Texas!

3. Supporters with cool names?  Got those too!  However, I think he could have been a little more creative here:  Bush calls his supporters “Pioneers” while Mao called his “Young Pioneers”, but since the Mao group was exclusively for children and Bush’s group is for adults with the minds of children we’ll let it slide.

4. Mood swings and mania?  Cha-ching!  Oh yeah!  Freaking out in front of friends while wildly thumping your chest and screaming “I’m the President, I’m the President” is about as wild-eyed crazy as an aspiring dictator can be!

5. Creating false threats and concocting new enemies to scare the masses?  You bet your WMD’s Junior has this one nailed!  And, in true dictatorial fashion, he has even managed to swap and switch enemies so fast that if they were women he’d be the envy of Hugh Hefner!

6. Systematically destroying all rights in the name of security?  Duh!  Do we even have to get into this one?

Well, what else would make this picture complete?  Have you guessed it yet?  I know I thought I had seen it all until just yesterday.  As I sat down at my computer I opened an email from a friend who shares my love of politics and, from time to time, emails job postings from various government departments and agencies, this time it was the White House internship program.  As I clicked the link and waited for the page to load I took a sip of my coffee and then choked and spit the hot coffee all over the desk as the words leapt off the screen and pounded my eyeballs…  “Thank you for your interest in SERVING PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH”

That’s right, nowhere on the page did it speak of “serving the country” or “serving the people” nor even “serving the government” but only of “serving President George W. Bush”.  I’m now waiting for the official speech from “The Great Leader” to make it all official, I can hear the words now:

“Ask not what President Bush can do for you… Ask what you can do for President Bush”

Yes it appears that “The Chosen One” has now taken his rightful place, like Kim Jong Il a place guaranteed by nothing more than birth to a previous title holder.  As the 21st century begins to unfold “The Great One” holds a position that is only occupied by a handful of other men such as Fidel Castro, Robert Mugabe and Kim Jong Il!  But never fear, my fellow Americans, we are still on top!  Castro is almost dead and Mugabe doesn’t have nukes!  “But wait!” you say, “Kim Jong Il has nukes too!”  Yes, you maybe right but he never had the guts to invade another sovereign nation!

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